Controlled Chaos Part 5

homecoming was well..... interesting. thats the best way to put it. i went to dinner with my date,nathan, and my best friend samantha :) im sooo glad she came. without her it would of been a worse evening. after dinner we drove around then headed to the dance. ha when we slow danced one song he tried to sing to me. i got soo weak and couldnt wait for the dance to be over! at the begging of the night we were dates but by the end we were just friends. something deffinatly changed. after the dance he took me home and i didnt talk to him until the next week. let alone, no one tells me of everything going on with him and im completly left out. lauren comes up to me momday after 6th periodd and says " have you seen nathan?" im like "no,, why?" she was then entitled to tell me the story of what has happened. apparently he got a huge heart break after that dance and sunday. he was really deppressed and was considering suicide???? WHAT THE HELL??? so what i get from that is somewhat selfish but, i guess my night with him didnt mean anything. after twirking and stuff and holding hands.. goodness. i give up. so now were just friends and everytime i look at the hundreds of pictures we took. lord help me. imma loose it. that rite there is some major chaos that is in the process of being controlled :)