Controlled Chaos Part 4

i do not like school. its the main reason everything is chaotic. i see the people that i dont want to see. i have assignments and issues that cause me to freak out.and when i get home i have homework that takes up all my free time that i need to figure things out that happened earlier. its like they make you go to school so there is always confusion. its soo annoying.

OMG today for the first time since a week before school started, the guy that started all my problems spoke to me. one little word... "HEY" i couldnt even say it back. he cought my eyes and we just looked at each other and it said a million words. we desperatly need to talk now. i think we will be able to. i hate the make up after getting plaed. but atleast there is this time. most of the time its just a cliffhanger... but i still love and care about him so it needs to be solved. more controlling of the chaos.

Controlled Chaos Part 3

im sick :/

and it sucks. but other than that everything is going to be okay, for a while. this weekend is my first competition. i personally, i am ready to take on anything. but my team,well,, there not the same. they dont know how to do anything at all. no joke, they get confused on which way is up...our coach is stressed, that makes me stressed. next year, i am captain. and they better get their acts together. group their poop and move on past this dumb spot. i cant just feel it, something is going to go wrong at the competition. they are going to forget the whole routien and where to go. theres goin to be wardrobe malfunctions and make up issues. and they will all be coming to me. our team has 28 people, that is chaos to the extreem. and of course when you try to fix them, they bitch a fit and get a attitude. im going to be, controlling chaos.

Controlled Chaos Part 2

My mom.. i swear. she is crazy. something is going on with her. probably menopause or something. she complains about every little thing. last night she was storming through the house yelling at every thing and everyone. it was terrible. and to make things worse, im sick. i feel terrible. my whole body aches. i need to go to bed now. but stupid school gets in the way of course. homecoming is still getting closer and closer and im still dateless. that one more thing i dont need to worry about. the only good thing about a monday is that its closer to friday than sunday.

Controlled Chaos Part 1

my life has been everything but organized and efficent. and sometimes i just cant hold it in anymore. i used to have a diary like little kids do, but now i feel like growing up and finding other ways to express my inner thoughts.

right now, the most uncontrolled and chaotic part of my life is school and every aspect of it. homecoming is coming up and i no longer have a date. this year i actually wanted one too. between trying to talk to the guy i now like and getting over a past half-a$$ed relationship. things get crazy. and on top of that i didnt get my coffee this morning. well isnt that a great way to start a cold fall morning...